I always loved Jon Abel`s story. I always come back to this video whenever I feel like I need to find God`s purpose in the things I`m doing or in the circumstances I`m in.

 

This is night, however, is different. I think about it and listen to his story because I feel like I need to be adequate in order to be loved by people around me. And I just need to be reminded that it`s not how well I`m doing things that merits my Father`s love. In fact, there`s nothing I can do to merit His love. He just freely gives it to me. Just as I am. Whether I succeed or fail.

 

When I was younger,  I really worked hard to gain the approval of people around me. I thought that if I do well in school or in my craft, people would like me and they would not leave. At some point in my life, I felt that people are around me only because I am useful, but if I weren`t, I wouldn`t even be called a friend.

 

I was so afraid to fail God, too. I really never wanted Him to leave. I thought that if I mess up or fail to reach the standard, He wouldn`t look at me the same way He used to.

 

But I was wrong.

 

God loves us just as we are. He delights in us and He just does.

 

I always tried to understand the measure of God`s love for me. But the more  I do that, the more I think how impossible it is for someone to love me with that kind of love that never runs out. What I`ve learned was that we need not understand that kind of love at all. We don`t need to grasp that kind of love with our finite, human minds. We just open our hearts to God and allow ourselves to be loved ever so deeply by our loving Heavenly Father who formed us in His hands.

 

“The instrument He is most concerned about is my heart.”

That`s my favorite line from Jon Abel`s story. God really doesn`t care if I become the greatest, most talented, most useful person who has ever lived. He is concerned about the status of my heart, if my heart is in sync with His, if I am secure and if I`m trusting what He says about how he loves me and if I am completely surrendered and obedient to Him.

 

Yes, He is most concerned about my heart. And that is a big relief. ;)

 

Nothing can separate
Even if I ran away
Your love never fails
I know I still make mistakes
But You have new mercies for me everyday
Your love never fails

You stay the same through the ages
Your love never changes
There maybe pain in the night but joy comes in the morning
And when the oceans rage
I don't have to be afraid
Because I know that You love me
Your love never fails